I’m part of the equation that all may be enter by mercy.”We were like men who dreamed”that’s what happens when el shaddai, el elion touches you, you become like him (1john 4;17).
You know what religion gets off on ,take a look at Galatians 5, works of the flesh .The boasting devoided of faith. Yet this believers enjoy temporary or partial victory, like the church type used in this book . For whenenver you get comfortable, the man of God would upset your comfort zone.
The misery of this in  believers is a pathetic one and most don’t  have a life cycle of more than eight years except the inner circle ones. “Those who dine with the king and queen”.
In this world dear children, you shall have tribulations but be of good cheer, for i have overcome the world (john). Not every voice is from God (james) for Pharisees will seek to silence your praise (book of Acts). They don’t want you to credit your testimony to Jesus ,man born blind (mathew). They want you to move on.Lest they loose their high seats.
Children of the light you will die if choose to dim your light, there is a reason you have a testimony and they don’t .There is a reason you suffered (galatians ). Condemnation is a spirit.Basically It’s  a debt consciousness reminding you that you don’t deserve your life until you pay or earn the requirements of the law. It comes when you experience an unwantancy from your neighbors, without the right foundation of God unconditional love, based on his son finished work, a life sentence is what some experience.
An inevitability on one consciousness ,like a splinter in your brain . Mine was extreme to where I exposed to the demonic, I would have visitations, experiences that people think that happen in movies, like the mirror experience,elevation .
The mirror experience is where your soul is called forth in a mirror (yeah like in the movies). But this one they don’t  show you, a mirror appears in your place of rest ,in a vision of the night, when you look into it, demons that hold you captive will appear there and mock you.
Elevation is the feeling of ascending or being suspended in mid air upon your place of rest . This things happen because of lack of truth (which is Jesus and his atonement for one ). The devil capitalised in my condemnation as the platform.
The sense of God’s  love exposes one to the good in the spirit world, but the lack of it opens up one to the evil in the spiritual. All things worked together for good ,in that all the rejection , caused me to loose faith in man slowly and have faith in God abundantly . You see, God can give you something you are not ready for .
I mean, he sees our hearts desires and here I talking of the gift of his Son,as your justification.
You can be saved but still not have the sense of acceptance of Jesus’s righteousness and are trying to earn it by your works.
You can be saved and still lack the enjoyment of that salvation .By believing in Jesus, you attain the abundance of grace and the gift of righteousnes spoken in romans 5:16.
Deep down I was seeking out for something. I didn know what it was, I thought it was out there but it was in me . I was the weak , gullible and naive Christian. I didn’ t grow up in the Christian experience to keep it modest, I still had the first love kind of fire .
Because i was stipped in sin in the world, i needed the same degree of heat to keep me warm as a Christian. You know the kind you are waiting for Jesus to come back. It was this in this state ,that i was oblivious of the toleration around me.”Where can I flee from your presence if i go up to the heavens you are there, if I make my bed in the depths of the earth you are still there” pslams 139.
Chrstian programmes both on television and radio became a bekone of hope to me. As i said earlier, I watched them night after night. I read the bible extensively to where i believed it literally(still do but my motive now is out of love than fear) . But because of wrong indoctrination about a judgemental and a conditional God ,i found that Jesus always stumbled me like in his sin teachings. Such as when your eye causes to seen cut it out ,it better to enter heaven maim than to go into hell whole. Yet this teachings are veiled as the children’ s bread.
This Christ words stumbled me for i carried a debt conscious . I trusted pastors who compared their righteousness one to another, who felt justified like Elijah before a trice holy God. I believed in them wholeheartedly. I felt safer in their corrupted veiled interpretation , than my personal one that i saw which i considered dangerous speared by the condemnation I was under.
It was a gift, the realisation that the law was perfect, for I knew the law unbending i was about to be ushered into the gift that only a condemned sinner can recieve, the gift of no condemanation


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